did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I think a kid would responsible me up
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize