they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
