Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
