Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Dick very happy bro
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
