So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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