How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
