how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
