need another drink. this is the easiest way
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
