Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I could make wine with my vomit
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
