butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize
