Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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