it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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