Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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