hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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