I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
