every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
