k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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