Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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