He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
