Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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