Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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