"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
