I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
