your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
being pregnant is like rehab
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You made out with two different species that night
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
