Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize