if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
