all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
