Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
