moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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