Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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