i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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