Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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