I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
