After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
