Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I feel like a drive thru vagina
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
