let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
