What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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