I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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