I'm passing your future prison.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
