Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
