North Korea, Best Korea!
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I still have a little drunk in my system
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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