It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
