I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
