Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize