Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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