it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
