They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
