well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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