A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
It's shark week go big or go home
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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