im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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