We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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