I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
