I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
