I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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